Unexpected Switch

Since the beginning of the VBAC journey, I have felt a little alone.  Other than my ICAN women, I didn't feel anyone around me truly understood how I felt about my birth with Baby C and why I want a different experience with our next child.  I mean, Daddy B has always been supportive, but I have never felt he truly "got it."  I worried how he would act under the pressure of an unplanned birth and probably a long labor.  I know my induction was hard on him and one reason he wanted the c-section was because he knew it would be over soon and I would stop being in pain.  

I have been doing research for months and months, probably more than a year.  I talk about it some with Daddy B, but he would interpret it as "I want a baby now," when it wasn't that at all.  Once we decided we were close to being ready to have another, or at least make steps towards that goal, I know he listened a little more about the importance of choosing the right care provider.  When I told him I felt we had 3 options of a good chance at the VBAC I wanted to happen in a hospital, he definitely leaned towards the closest location, which was the Nurse-Midwife group at 23 miles from our house.  I wrote about that appointment here.  I was determined not to jump at the first provider we saw, but we left the appointment and we were like, "okay I guess this works."  Then, I heard that the local ICAN group was holding its May meeting tonight and the speaker was a well known VBAC OBGYN in the area.  Dr. C isn't the typical OB.  He believes in VBAC just like he believes that God has His hand on every pregnant woman and her birth.  He sees the things that have happened with birth and is one of the few OB's that is determined to do things different.  I decided to drag Daddy B with me to this meeting.  I kept pestering him, sending him reminders about the meeting tonight and ensuring that he had no reason to "forget."  I figured it would be a good opportunity to just have Daddy B learn about VBAC and give him more insight.  

Little did I know, Daddy B sat there tonight absorbing it all.  When we left, he told me he thought we should make the hour drive and have Dr. C be our OBGYN to deliver our next baby.  I was shocked!  One of the most important things to me with this birth is that Daddy B be on board and be comfortable with everything that can and will happen.  To be honest, I had a feeling in my gut that wasn't convinced the Nurse-Midwife group was the right choice.  I thought maybe it was simply because I would never be sure.  

As we talked in the car, I felt for the first time that Daddy B and I were on the same page.  He understands more about why I want this for us, for me, for our baby.  I'm so happy I could cry!  I told him I felt deep down that the Nurse-Midwife group wasn't the right choice but didn't voice it because I thought he wanted to go with them.  He told me he felt the exact same way and had a knot in his stomach about the whole thing!  We feel so confident in our choice to switch.  I can't believe we are committing to such a drive, but I had an ICAN mama say it best, "the drive is worth it to get the birth you want."  

Maybe it's my crazy hormones from the Mirena being removed a couple of weeks ago, but I get choked up every time I think about how thankful I am for my husband and for him being supportive and honest.  

I'll do another post soon about the words of wisdom I took from Dr. C tonight.  It was two hours packed with good info and advice!