Made it to Texas!

I won't say this leg of the journey has been easy.  The past couple of weeks have been some of the hardest emotionally that I've gone through, which I'm sure has a little something to do with the crazy amounts of hormones running through me.  I've prayed so much about the decision to come back to Texas to have this baby and thankfully, the Lord has given me peace every time I've lifted my concerns up in prayer.  It's just the rest of the time when I'm spending too many moments thinking about the "what ifs?" that get me antsy.  I've had many evenings with Daddy B talking and crying about my fears and concerns with leaving Baby C and him for what could turn in to a month and how much control I'm having to surrender when it comes to this birth.  I've had some people not understand why I didn't just bring Baby C with me to Texas, but I don't really feel like I need to explain myself.  We've worked through all the possible scenarios and this is what works best for my family.  Don't you think it's the hardest thing I've ever, ever had to do to leave my baby?  Don't you think that leaving my husband, who is my biggest support person, at this point in my pregnancy is also one of the hardest things I've had to do?  What has kept me going is the peace the Lord is giving me over our decision as a family for a true chance at a VBAC, the encouragement from Daddy B and the friends and family who "get it" and understand each step of our decision making process, and trying to remember that this time will pass quickly and I will look back on this short time period with gratefulness for the undivided attention I'm able to give my new little one.  As hard as it is for me to wrap my head around it, my heart knows that I am going to love this new baby just as much as I love Baby C and I can't WAIT to experience that once they arrive!

In the past week, Daddy B and I got everything done on my to-do list with the exception of installing the car seat, but Daddy B is going to do that this weekend.  My good friend came in to town last Wednesday, MIL came in town Thursday and then Friday morning my friend and I hit the long road back to DFW.  Thursday night was reallllly rough.  I had to say goodbye to Baby C and was a complete mess after I put him down for bed.  What really made me feel better though was having my friend, my MIL and her husband all there showering me with love and support.  It humbles me so much to realize how many people care about my little family and this sweet baby coming in to the world.  Since then, I've held it together pretty well, with the exception of yesterday afternoon when I just really missed my family and what we would be doing on a Saturday at home.  I'll tell you what, I am SO thankful I'm with my brother, SIL and niece and nephew because it makes being away from my husband and son a lot easier.  My nephew (he'll be 6 in June) knows that when I'm missing Baby C, he is required to come give me lots of good cuddles! :)

I've also noticed an increase the past few days in the frequency and intensity of the Braxton Hicks I've been having.  The other night, I was actually able to notice a pattern and they were about 5 minutes apart for a solid hour.  So I'm pretty sure my body is on the road towards preparing for labor, I just hope it's sooner rather than later! 

I go see Dr. C on Tuesday.  My mom is a teacher and is coming to spend her spring break with me, so she's taking me to the appointment Tuesday.  Let's just say she's REALLY hoping this baby decides their birthday is next week.  I told her not to hold her breath.  ;)