A Cesarean and Breastfeeding

I had a plan when I was pregnant.  I would be induced, have an epidural, deliver vaginally and start breastfeeding and continue breastfeeding for at least a year.  Funny how we make "plans," right?

To say breastfeeding was hard for me is definitely an understatement.  First of all, breastfeeding is hard for anyone.  Three of the close women in my life all have really great, unique stories about breastfeeding.  I want to tell you a little bit about their experiences, since I'm sure I will be referring to them in this blog.  I'm leaving out their children's names just to be safe and respect their privacy.

Aunt K - She's my sister-in-law and one of my closest friends.  She has two kids, my nephew who is 4 1/2 and my niece who is 10 months. She was induced with both, had epidurals with both and had successful vaginal deliveries.  She had an over supply of milk with her first baby and this led to her decision to exclusively pump for 4 months, with the milk lasting for 6 months.  With her second, she had a great lactation consultant and breastfed for 6 months after overcoming the first challenging few weeks.  So proud of her!

Amiga C - My best friend since high school!  She has one child (planning on more!) and her breastfeeding story is famous!  :)  But really, it was just featured on Mama Birth!  She breastfed for over 6 months after suffering through preeclampsia, which resulted in a 36 week, induced birth with epidural (which she did not like) with her cute-as-a-button daughter.  I remember when she was pregnant she wasn't even sure if she wanted to attempt breastfeeding and has gone on to believe in it so much!  She is one of those women who has just blossomed as a mother! I am also so proud of her!

Cousin M - If you want to talk about a determined mommy, you need to look no further than my cousin M.  She had her daughter about 6 weeks after I had Baby C and had a long early labor at home before heading to the hospital and having a quick, natural birth. Her little girl showed signs quickly of food sensitivities in Cousin M's breastmilk.  I mean folks, she gave up everything to continue breastfeeding: dairy, red meat, certain veggies, all spicy food, went gluten-free, EVERYTHING.  Now this DID help Cousin M to get to a great post-pregnancy weight, but I think she would've rather been able to have a big bowl of mac n' cheese and still breastfeed!  ;)  She is my hero when it comes to breastfeeding and I'm proud to tell you at 17 months old, Mommy and baby are still going strong with nursing!

What do all of these women have in common besides successfully breastfeeding?  A vaginal birth.

I've thought a lot about how my birth with Baby C may have impacted my failure at breastfeeding.  Here's a recap:

• I breastfed in the hospital, but did not have a great lactation consultant.  She kept asking me if it hurt and I would say, "Well it's not comfortable, but I guess it doesn't hurt."  She said that was normal.  I don't think it was.
• The lactation consultant was already having me supplement with formula in a syringe while in the hosptial.  My colostrum should have been enough!
• My milk came in somewhere between 6 and 7 days after giving birth. 
• Baby C had a horrible latch and before my milk really came in, I was already bleeding.
• To attempt to heal and take a break from the VERY painful experience of trying to nurse on bleeding nipples, I pumped for a couple of days and surrendered to giving Baby C pumped milk and formula.  It was then that I noticed I was only making about an ounce on the left and less than 1/2 an ounce on the right per pumping session.  This never increased.
• I was worried about Baby C getting enough so when Aunt K suggested I do exclusive pumping like she did with her first, it sounded like a good idea. We both thought I could maybe be as successful as she was with her first.
• I lasted 6 weeks pumping.  I pumped about 7 times a day and made a maximum of 12 ounces in 24 hours.  I got 3 clogged ducts and started to develop mastitis.
• Funny side note - that pump started saying evil things to me!  In the late hours of the night I swear it would chant "Kill the bitch!"  LOL It's a running joke in the family now that the pump is possessed!  ;)
• When I went to my postpartum vist with the OB who delivered me, told her of all my struggles and showed her the clogged milk ducts, she actually told me to give up. And she was currently a breastfeeding mother!

So I did.  I gave up.  I wish that I knew then what I know now about breastfeeding and I also wish I had Aunt K, Amiga C and Cousin M's and their experiences already with me when I was attempting it with Baby C.  I can't go back though and Baby C is a healthy 19 month old now, so I can't really be too upset.  I feel like I did the best I could at the time with the knowledge I had been given.  I know better for next time.  I can't help but wonder though, did my feelings about being inadequate to the point of not being able to birth my baby the way God intended have an impact on my feelings about being able to breastfeed?  I believe they did.

On to the point of this post...

I feel like a big reason my milk supply was so low was because my body wasn't ready to have a baby (another post, for another day).  I've talked to many VBAC mamas who had a similar experience with their first, but swear it was better after giving a natural birth.  I'm looking forward to that!

Here's a great article on breastfeeding after a cesarean.